greggoconnell.com blog

This is really in no particular order. Enjoy it :)

1. When you die you won't be let down by not seeing God or getting into Heaven.

2. Your chances of being molested by a priest go down drastically.

3. You get to have intercourse with as many people as possible without the guilt trip of thinking the big guy upstairs wouldn't want you doing this!

4. You get 5 minutes freed up every night before you go to bed. Woohoo to 5 extra minutes of sleep!

5. Masturbate every single morning, noon & night. Right now "God" says masturbation is bad! bad! bad! so get your hands out of your pants!!!

6. You get to finally worship Satan and wear black every day!

7. No more stale pieces of bread and cranberry juice!

8. You can start dating your best friend Mike without feeling guilty, even if he has the same genitalia as you!

9. You can finally believe in evolution. Now you can freely and confidently say that we derived from apes at one time or another.

10. No more believing that Ole Mighty God is the one responsible for all the massive natural disasters and that the world is going to end soon because we are all fighting with one another. We know that WE are the ones that can and will end our world not some supernatural force!

Did I miss anything?

gso

Labels: List, Religion

Do you know this guy Joel Osteen? He's this CREEPY Senior Pastor for the fastest growing church in America the Lakewood Church. I know of him because he's on USA right now doing an infomercial. He has this shit face smile on. It's one of those plastic smiles that phony bologna Human Resource people have when they're interviewing you. You know when they act like they are interested in what you're saying but they don't give more than 2 or 3 shits about it.

People like Joel that scare people through religion are seriously fucked & greedy! The scare tactics they use with "you can't get to heaven without doing this, this & this" makes people think that this is true. The televangelists of the world pray on weak people who feel like they need someone to lead them to the "promise land". This in turn allows televangelists like Joel Osteen to make these weak people feel like they need to give away their hard earned cash to these cult like religions in order to spread the word of God.

I really wish they'd put warning signs on these televangelist infomericals like they do on cigarette cartons stating "By giving away your money and following this con artist it doesn't mean you will get into, close or near heaven once you are deceased." It really bugs me that people fall for this shit. People like this dude almost seem to always contradict their own words. They seem to always be getting arrested for sleeping with hookers, doing drugs or sucking some dudes cock in a parking lot in their truck.

Are you with me my brothers and sisters? Trust my words and I'll lead you to the promise land. PRAY WITH ME!!! "Gregg is our shepherd as he types through the valley of the shadow of death. He leads us into the divine land of life, love and the pursuit of happiness...Amen"

gso

Labels: Pissed Off, Religion